7/12/17

A Resume Attempt

Choose Your Own Metaphor!
Hi, guys. How's your summer going? After three and a half years of making a go of it as a freelancer who also raises children, I've decided to dip my toe in the ice cold waters of looking for a more traditional job with a more traditional paycheck. For anyone who has ever looked for a job, you know how it feels. Can you wear many high-demand hats while thriving in a fast-paced environment? Are you a self-starting multi-tasking professional with expert graphic design skills? Did we mention those HATS? 

I revamped my resume, but I don't think it fully represents me and many of my worthwhile skills, so I made a version that I think does. What do you think? Would you hire me? [I had to load it here as three different screenshots, so please bear with.]

16 comments:

  1. I would totally hire you. Also, all resumes should have a "favorite notion" section. xoxo

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  2. Loose / shapeless jumpsuits and dresses are not a weakness at all! (As an introvert, I also appreciate your Dickinson notion -- too often that inward journey is so overlooked or discounted!) Love your resume 2.0 -- would totally hire you! You express your talents and skills in a real way rather than BS-it-up.

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  3. We're hiring in my office. Move to Chicago and I can be your boss. x

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  4. Yes, move to Chicago and then take the train to my house. I second everything: I would hire you and fund your loose dresses wholeheartedly

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  5. I wholeheartedly endorse you keeping he part in about the Bookman family; credit where credit is due!

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  6. I went to Hopkins about the same time and your description made me laugh out loud. HIRED.

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  7. Unofficial Hopkins reunion in the comments: count me in! Also, YES. So many fascinating people make ourselves sound boring in our resumes. You...didn't.

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  8. @cmg @Anna Baltimore itself probably taught me more than JHU...amirite?? though that one criminal justice class really blew my 20-year-old baby mind. Also, the casual sexual assault. geez.

    @Tim M THANKS for the job offer! I'll add it to my resume to create a sense of urgency?

    @Kris W @Kara @Alison thanks, guys! xoxxoxx

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  9. this is awesome, Amelia. i'm not in need of a resume update at the moment, being self-employed and all, but maybe i could hire you to help me make my bio less stodgy. (i'm a cellist/teacher, and artist bios always read the same..."so and so studied with this famous teacher and went to this famous school and played in this famous orchestra. they also play a fancy instrument that costs more than your car")
    ps muumuus = life

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  10. @Caitlin Fahey: That is so true! I think an @Amelia Morris kind of bio would work very well for a musician! It would be very refreshing.

    Love your bio @Amelia Morris!

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  11. Dear Amelia, I just loved your Bio, I loved and love everything about it. It has also inspired me to write something similar. Am chronically ill and need to find work that I can do at home. To hide the illness seems necessary and counterproductive at the same time. So I will give it a try your way. Off to try and be equally eloquent and lovely in German as you are in English. Greetings from Berlin and loads of good luck, Anja

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  12. it doesn't come off as too professional - too chatty, almost; but maybe that's the creative writer's edge when crafting a resume? I would work on something stronger. You seem to be a strong woman and this is more limp biscuit.

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  13. @m. Well, just to be clear, I haven't actually sent out this version of my resume to any potential employers. It was more of a fun exercise. And hey, thanks for the compliment--I consider myself a strong woman too, but also that being strong can mean so much more than our culture seems to allow for. I think there's so much strength in patience, practicality, emotionally flexibility, allowing oneself to stagnate, to even regress(!), allowing oneself to be vulnerable, etc. And unfortunately--you don't really see those traits under any of the bullet points in job-listing descriptions, ya know??

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  14. *emotional flexibility (Also strength in admitting one's mistake!) :)

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  15. This is the most random spot for it, but I am now private on Twitter (Badger Reader) so you wouldn't see it if I tagged you there. Did you see this article about caftan love (now with custom dog prints)? https://www.racked.com/2017/8/8/16099002/patricias-couture-pet-caftans

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  16. I would hire you, perhaps as a gardener. The resume bullet points afterward would read, in Edna St Vincent Millay's words:

    "She digs in her garden
    With a shovel and a spoon,
    She weeds her lazy lettuce
    By the light of the moon."

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